Tuesday, March 25, 2008

this g@#-forsaken place called Michigan.

We have broken our snow records.....
Winter advisories are in effect and I have had enough.

Michigan - God's Country - the joke

Aug 12 - Moved to Michigan. It is so beautiful here. The hills are so serene and beautiful. Can hardly wait to see snow cover them. God's country...I love it here.

Oct 14 - Michigan is the most beautiful place. The leaves are turning all different colors, I love the shades of red and orange. I went for a ride through the beautiful country side and spotted some deer, they are so graceful certainly they are the most peaceful animals on earth. This must be paradise Michigan, I love it here.

Nov 11 - Deer season will start soon. I can't imagine anyone wanting to kill such an elegant creature. The very symbol of peace and tranquillity. Hope it will snow soon...I love it here.

Dec 2 - It snowed last night. Woke up to find everything blanketed in white, it looks like a post card. We went outside and cleaned the snow off of the steps and shoveled the driveway. We had a snowball fight, (I won) and when the snowplow came by, we had to shovel the driveway out again. What a beautiful place. Mother nature in perfect harmony... I love Michigan.

Dec 12 - More snow last night. I love it. The snowplow did his trick again (that rascal). Winter wonderland... I love it here.

Dec 19 - More snow last night. Couldn't get out of the driveway to get to work this time. I'm exhausted from shoveling. F@#$%^& snowplow...

Dec 22 - More of the white s@#$ fell last night. I've got blisters on my hands from all this d@#% shoveling. I think the snow plow man hides around the corner and waits till I'm done shoveling my driveway...a_ _ hole!

Dec 25 - "White Christmas" my busted a@#! More friggin snow. If I ever get my hands on that son-of-a-b@#$% who drives that snow plow, I swear I'll castrate that dumb bastard. Don't know why they don't use more salt on the roads to melt this f@#$%^ ice.

Dec 28 - More white s@#$ fell last night. Been inside since Christmas Day, except for shoveling out the driveway after "Snow Plow Harry" comes by, prick...g_ _-d_ _ _ car is behind a ton of snow. The weatherman said to expect another 10 inches of s@#$ tonight. Do you know how many shovels of snow 10 inches is?

Jan 1 - Happy F@#$%^$ New Year. The weatherman was wrong (again.) We didn't get 10" last night, we got 34", stupid a_ _ weatherman anyway. At this rate it won't melt before the 4th of July. The snow plow got stuck up the road and the s@#$head had the balls to come to the door and asked to borrow my shovel. After I told him I've broken 6 shovels already, shoveling all the sh@# he pushed into my driveway, I broke the last one over his f@#$%$ head.

Jan 4 - Finally got out of the house today. Went to the store to get food, on the way back a g@#d@#$ deer ran in front of me. I hit the bastard and tore my car all to hell. Did $3,000 in damages. Those f@#$%^$ beasts should be killed. Wish the hunters had killed all of them last November.

May 3 - Took the car to the garage in town. Would you believe the thing rotted out from all the f@#$%^$ salt they keep dumping all over the road. Car looks like a piece of----.

May 10 - Moved back to New Mexico, I can't imagine why anyone in their right f@#$%^$ mind would ever want to live in this g@#-forsaken place called Michigan.

Funny Joke.. credits

2 comments:

  1. Too funny and I can relate since moving to the mountains.

    Tahoe is calling your name TJ and we have sun.

    Love ya!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I have a feeling you'd really hate Wisconsin--we're used to snow but even here the snowfall is breaking records.

    ReplyDelete

Nothing makes you more tolerant of a neighbor's noisy party than being there. ~ Franklin P. Jones
Attitude is a Choice.